Posted by PS on April 08, 2005 at 11:31:03:
many years ago
in a distant land
on this very day
a tiny baby ox calf was born
in a field
in the spring
and there was great rejoicing
among all the oxen
in the field
many years later
the very same
and quite manly
fully grown ox bull
saw a heifer
bold and beautiful
shining in the sun
in the field
in the lush grasses
soaked with dew
in his huge
and manly
ox bull chest
his heart beat fervently
and in no way
did his manly torso
look like a monkey
but i digress...
the manly ox knew
in that very moment
that he must fight
and die if necessary
to make that magnificent heifer
his very own
and by some miracle
he survived
and got that heifer
and there was great rejoicing
among all the oxen
in the field
and many years
after the birth
of that ox
and his glorious
and sultry heifer
another baby calf was born
a tiny bull
and there was great rejoicing
among all the oxen
in the field
and yet another baby calf was born
a heifer!
and there was great rejoicing
among all the heifers
in the field
and the bull ox wept
and his great tears
angered the heifer
so the bull rejoiced
with reservations
and yet another baby calf was born
a tiny bull
and there was great rejoicing
among all the bulls
in the field
because they had won
and both the manly ox bull
and the lovely heifer
also rejoiced
with substantial reservations
the beautiful
and magnificent
and fertile heifer
swore to the bull
by the gods of the field
and the moutains
and the waterfalls
and the springs
that if once again
he were to give her
a beautiful baby ox
she would gore him through herself
and the bull ox
proud and strong
content in his vitality
but fearful for his life
got a vasectomy
the end
happy birthday, you strong and manly
ox in the field