Posted by cav on November 09, 2005 at 19:27:25:
In Reply to: The desperate attempt to be comfortable in my existence and attain my destiny, American-style. posted by PS on November 08, 2005 at 22:02:28:
: : Have you noticed how much we whine about things? I am periodically struck by how much of a whiner I am. Sure mostly it's not just straight whining, but I'm always focused on my problems. The thing is the problems are so minor in the scheme of things that I actually kind of sicken myself.
: : That and I always want to fix things. Even minor little things I start looking for solutions or at least explanations to. I don't even think I was able to see that I did this until I had to live in a culture that decidedly doesn't try to fix things in most cases.
: : Are we taught to be this way? I think we're definitely encouraged. Probably not directly, but in subtle ways we're encouraged to focus on what we need and to resolve every irritation.
: : Anyone else experience this? Are we naturally just a bunch of wusses?
: : Geez, get over myself!
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: Lord, I could have written this myself, except for the living in Japan part.
: You hit it on the head:
: : Are we taught to be this way? I think we're definitely encouraged. Probably not directly, but in subtle ways we're encouraged to focus on what we need and to resolve [the problem].
: (I modified the end of your quote to set aside the specific personality traits we both share which cause the irritation/complaining response that is natural to us.)
: We in this culture are all subject to this kind of "what is wrong?" and "what do I lack?" and "what do I need to fix it?" mentality. And we are directly bombarded with "answers." These tactics are extremely effective because they employ the ideals we hold most dear and appeal to our well being.
: Take our supposed ideal of the equality of all people in this culture. If we are all "equal," it seems fair to the human mind that we should all experience the same abundance, satisfaction, and success. Therefore, when we see constant evidence via the media and our contacts with others that we do not in fact have the "equality" that certain others do, we feel unfulfilled as people, because we are not "equal." We long for everything that we are told we ought to have, which others who are "equal" with us have. By accepting this perspective that we are lacking things essential to our well-being and essential to our being what we are supposed to be, our life can only revolve around desire for the missing pieces, and we never find the meaning in our own existence, we never discover what it means to BE.
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: Now be a good FarEastern-minded American boy and put your answer underneath mine so as not to confuse the other poor readers who are already preoccupied with what the last 5 commercials told them they need to be happy and healthy people and not lose out on life.
I think it is one of the first crucial realizations for people who begin to "turn contemplative" so to speak: that we are not all equal. The second step would be that this is how it is meant to be. Of course there are countless divergent paths that I personally know people have taken, from the 'shed as much as I can and become a subsistence farmer' to the 'take a vow of poverty and wear burlap and go bare-footed as a monk in Ybor city' to the 'inequality may be natural but I'm striving for utopia and will go to jail protesting all the hatemongers' type. But that's a different story.
But even mainstream churches get so into the 'get what you need here' thing. I sometimes amuse myself thinking what it would be like if that didn't happen. What would the sermon be like and how would the people act? The closest picture I can get in my head is Fight Club. You know where everyone finally gets it and quits worrying about all the crap, they just work together like a machine to provide for themselves and start liberating people.
You know in some ways I think we need something like that to force us out of our mindsets. In fact lots of people have thought that. This was precisely one of the founding ideologies of the punk movement, you know that? A group of people started realizing how they were getting sapped and drained by vicarious culture so they started getting totally in your face to wake people up to the fact that life was out there to be experienced.
And the thing is I get so sick of myself looking at how my job isn't perfect or I had this hassle this week...But not once did I ever have to think about having food, or being warm, or getting knifed, or dealing with excruiating pain from some incurable illness. Good God, when my truck started to go bad, I just went out and bought another one the same day! Sure I'm not rich, but I certianly have EVERY need met.
So that used to make me embarassed to have so much, like I should be giving more of it away...but I think I also learned in Japan how to accept a blessing in thankfulness. Now I almost feel like it is an insult to the giver (or Giver, as the case may be)if I don't accept it and use it properly. So I guess like most things it's about finding that middle path...balance.